Thursday, 4 February 2010

I wish I'd known the words to Ballamory in Italian, now.

I have returned from a giggle-tastic, hysterical and hyperactive night out with the history society. It was fab. The lecture was interesting but light-hearted, and dinner with Steve Pumfrey was great fun, specially for those in the middle of the tables that entered conversations at entirely the wrong moments, and the lobster-and-crab activities in the fish tank generated plenty of amusement.

Once we had eaten our fill and said goodnight, four of us went for the bus, and were conversing about various topics that came up in the evening, when walking through the bus station and hobo-like man said to Simon, "I like you".

It was because of his yellow waistcoat, fine riding boots and tucked in yellow trousers. Quite the Derby Gent. We were giggling about how Simon had pulled and eventually the guy came up to us and started talking. He called Simon, "John Wayne", and proceeded to check his pockets to see if he had a gun.
He then asked us all where we were from, told us he was from Naples, and then started to ask poor Kate about Liverpool FC, cause he was a footyfan. We were all struggling to not laugh out loud, but he was so funny. He tried to get her to sing 'Agadoo' with him, then tried to get us all to sing ''What's the Story in Ballamory?" He then called Kate "Ginger", Chris something I can't pronounce or even spell (a band, apparently!) and me, Maggie (don't know why, or how I look like a Maggie, and no, it's not close to my real name at all). He also wanted us to dance, for some reason. He wasn't drunk, just smelt of fags.
He saw his bus had arrived, and was telling us Ciao and to watch the footy on Saturday (LFC vs Everton, apparently) and then pointed at a couple around their late 50s and said "they're Welsh! Say goodbye in Welsh, Maggie!"
"I don't speak Welsh" and the man in the couple said something in welsh, crossing his eyes at us, as the Neapolitan was tickled pink by the humouring and went his way.

We 4 and the old couple were practically wetting ourselves laughing.
Had great fun on the bus home talking about it - somehow guns have turned into a reference to male genitalia, and how guns are loaded, and occasionally some men fire blanks (need fertility help).

Epic night.

No comments: