Wednesday, 27 January 2010

My Top Cartoon Villains

This is largely inspired by the Top 100 Disney villains, but I didn't agree with some of the ordering, and I also want to consider non-Disney villains. I'll do the list from Pathetic-> Cool. I would number them as I go, but I can't even be sure how many I'll have in the end. ^_^ Not 100, don't worry.

Dastardly (and Mutley)
Well what can I say about this villainous duo? They're in at least 3 cartoons and never achieve their goal. They always lose in amazing ways, and never ever keep a hold of Penelope Pitstop. His clothes, though made of the regal colours of purple and red, do nothing for him, and the only thing creepy about him is his weirdly thin moustache which really looks more like nose hair! 
Skinner (Ratatouille)
He's short, he's got a MASSIVE chef hat (ho hum) and he has a great disliking to poor, pathetic Languini who might (is) be the illegitemate son of his deceased boss, and therefore the new owner of one of the most famous and popular restaurants in Paris. His entire plan gets foiled. By a rat. Nice.



The Groke (The Moomins)
The source of nightmares for my brother, and no doubt other Moomins fans, this she-monster is really the most misunderstood ''villain'' of Japanese cartoons. Silent apart from one horribly haunting screaming of ''I'll be back'', she really only wanted the affection of Moomin (in the books) and pretty objects stolen by midgety duo Thingumy and Bob.

Magneto (X-men Evolution series)
Really, he's just an old man in a suite with slightly better aging abilities than the average mutant. He can bend steal and make cool "vooooooooom" noises, and sure, he wants to create a mutant-ruled world, wiping out all weakling, degenerate humans, but honestly in the end he has to fight WITH his enemies and even is seen in a prediction of Xavier joining the X-men. He's just a so-called freedom fighter with a brain.

The Witch of the Waste (Howl's Moving Castle)
For some reason she curses a hatshop girl and turns her into an old woman, hinting that perhaps she should seek out Howl, a vane, cowardly wizard that hides from everything. In the book she's far more impressive, but in this film, she's more easily to feel sympathetic to, since Howl had "pursued" her, to ditch her for not being beautiful. She's then got her powers stripped and turns into this kindly if pathetic granny figure.

Tai Lung (Kung Fu Panda)
Ah, here we have a villain that made an admirable attempt. He knew his goal, was a steroid-pumped-looking leopard and his whiskers made a stereotypical Chinese moustache. Not to mention the kick-ass kung fu and weird-ass survival ability. Unfortunately he's defeated by fat panda who understood the world surprisingly better than most people.


Gaston (Beauty and the Beast)
Actually, he's one of my personal favourite characters. He's vain, he's devious (when he thinks, and that's a dangerous pastime) and there's something delicious about his voice. I don't know what it is. Oh and ''every last inch of (him) is covered with hair". Come on. Who doesn't love that scene? He's the ultimate beast of the film, teaching us that beauty is only skin deep yada yada. Actually, it's one of my favourite fairy tales, but not really cause of the film...


Scar (The Lion King)
He committed fratricide, guilt-tripped his cub-nephew and goaded him into running away before setting 3 (stupid) hyenas on him, took over the throne as King of the Jungle, has a fantastic voice-actor (Jeremy Irons) and meets his end ultimately being betrayed by his equally betrayed Nazi-like army of hyenas. The images and connections made with him to McBeth, Hamlet and historic scenes are endless for students.

Beatrice, the Golden Witch (Umineko no Naku Koro ni)
This is a witch of timelessness. She brutally tortures and kills a family in a ritual to regain her body over and over again for 26 episodes, whilst one member of said family tries in vain to prove that she doesn't exist (I know, right?). She's sometimes a vindictive character, othertimes a tragic one. Which is she really? Nobody really knows - it depends on how the 'game' is played that time around...

Maleficent (Sleeping Beauty)
She has the bestest fashion sense ever - her make up is so 80s. Not to mention a wonderfully un-American voice, an evil laugh, a raven and weird little gremlin minions. She can turn into a dragon, and from the descriptions of her by the Fairy Godmothers, she is even a psychopath and feels no emotion. Except perhaps sadism, and the indignation at not being invited to the Princess's christening party.

Rail Tracer (Baccano!)
He's a myth. Or so they thought - he kills people on trains, and makes it as though they never existed. He is part of the gory catastrophe upon the transcontinental train The Flying Pussyfoot. He judges humans as he goes, marking those who've ever done something truly bad in their life time before finding some way of ripping the flesh from their skin or beheading them or something bloody.

Rothbart (The Swan Princess)
Here is a character that actually makes me laugh, with his sarcasm and weird potential-domestic-abuser comments. His voice actor must have had great fun doing the voice. His voice is corny whispered, his song is jazzy, and he has turned a princess into a part-time swan, for the sake of forcing her to either marry him and give him her kingdom, or to just give him her kingdom. Either's good. He also plays havoc with poor shallow Prince Derek's vow of everlasting love by making him give it to the (obviously) wrong girl, which is a death sentence for Swan-formed Odette.

Yagami Light, a.ka. Kira (Death Note)
A righteous student gets hold of a Death Note(book) dropped by a mischievous Death God, Ryuk. He decides he can change the world with this, by judging all criminals, killing them off in huge numbers in his bedroom, attracting the attention of police and secret agents everywhere. His idea may seem noble at first, but in the end he gets a sick thrill out of the circles he runs around L, his adversary, and becomes quite obviously psychotic; he thinks of himself as a god, emotionally abuses a misguided girl, drives his unsuspecting father to his death and then eventually is caught after a long 38 episodes. His eyes glow read, too, when he's writing down names. How weird is that?

     Frollo (The Hunchback of Notre Dame)
The mentioning of Light brings on my (cut down version) comparison of Frollo, the righteous high judge and Light. Both want to rid the world of corruption, and both go crazy. Only difference really is that Frollo gets a real hard on for Esmarelda (he is a real pervert. Just watch his Hellfire song on Youtube), an outspoken Gypsy, (Light doesn't for L, as far as we know) and he's living in the days when even Frollo wouldn't presume to aspire to the level of a deity. No, he follows God's commands instead. He is the embodiment of a religious fanatic that truly believes what he is doing is right, and there is *no* way his soul is going to hell. He also kinda talks like a rapist - "she led me on wearing that outfit", "she put the thoughts in my head. I tried to stop them", "she should choose me or death at the stake".

The First Homunculus (Full-metal Alchemist: Brotherhood)
I'm ignoring the original series version, since I've not actually watched it. But this thing is evil - a weird alchemical experiment that tricks an entire province into creating a human transmutation circle, wiping an entire population in one night, he takes on the form of the poor slave from whose blood he was made. He then goes on to make other homunculi using cities as human sacrifices, causing wars and massive bloodshed. His minions aren't too friendly either - Envy is one weird homunculus when he's not in his prettier more human form. He has a great disdain for humans, but all his underling homunculi are human emotions (the deadly sins). Currently, he's planning an entire country massacre, using the wiped out provinces to create an even bigger transmutation circle. What for? No idea. For the hell of it. Which is perhaps why he has come top so far, at the top of my head.

Next will be ''Most pathetic heroes -> least pathetic".

*Special Mention* Since talking to my brother about this blog piece (and his own consequent creation of a top 10 list), it's come to my attention that I missed out Feathers McGraw. But then he's not quite cartoon... he's plasticine (in a way Ratatouille isn't), so I guess that's why it didn't occur to me.
But that is ONE evil penguin. Seriously. He's a mastermind diamond thief! Shame he got caught and put in a zoo. And I couldn't have put it better about Mrs Tweedy myself than my brother did.

I'd also like to say I wanted to put Spirited Away's Yubaba in the list somewhere, but felt I had too many half-assed villains there.

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